Thor God of Thunder

1.2 Overall Score
Graphics: 1/10
Gameplay: 1/10
Bag of Dicks: 10/10

Still better than Iron Man.

When the first Thor movie came out I was so afraid that it was going to suck. I was worried that it would be nothing but Norse gods having a dick measuring contest while talking like drunk, retarded, babies. I thought if this whole movie is based in Asgard I will literally smash my face in with a Thor size hammer.

Long story short the movie was awesome, and none of the above was true. The game however was all that I feared and a bag of dicks. Seriously the graphics sucked, the story was terrible… No worse than that… What is a word worse then terrible….. Thorable?? The gameplay mechanics were worse that an N64 game and the… Fuck… FUCK… FUCK! I don’t fucking care about any of this.. This game is so bad I am getting mad even writing this review. It damaged me emotionally and causes mental anguish…. I have dreams where counselors ask me to show them on a teddy bear where Thor touched me….

NO THOR, YOU DO NOT HAVE THE RIGHT TO TOUCH ME IN MY BATHING SUITE AREA!!!!!!



5 Names that should have been considered for this game.

  1. Thor: God of Blunder
  2. Thor: God this Game is Boring
  3. Thor: Sega just stole $60 from you!
  4. Thor: Please Don’t Touch me there.
  5. Thor: FUCK, FUCKETY, FUCK FUCK

 – Couch Badges


 

 

 

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Author: DarkManSam View all posts by

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